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	<title>Gynzer's Musings &#187; Jokes</title>
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	<description>Politics, Science, End-Times ... and enything else I find interesting</description>
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		<title>Carrying the Flashlight</title>
		<link>http://portal.gynzer.com/wordpress/?p=127</link>
		<comments>http://portal.gynzer.com/wordpress/?p=127#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 01 Jan 1970 00:00:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ron_Gines</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Jokes]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[A New York boy was being led through the swamps of Louisiana by his cousin. 
&#8220;Is it true that an alligator won&#8217;t attack you if you carry a flashlight?&#8221; 
The cousin smirked and replied, &#8220;Depends on how fast ya carry the flashlight.&#8221;  
]]></description>
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		<title>Bread Statistics</title>
		<link>http://portal.gynzer.com/wordpress/?p=126</link>
		<comments>http://portal.gynzer.com/wordpress/?p=126#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 01 Jan 1970 00:00:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ron_Gines</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Jokes]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[1. More than 98 percent of convicted felons are bread users.
2. Fully HALF of all children who grow up in
bread-consuming households score below average on
standardized tests.
3. In the 18th century, when virtually all bread was baked
in the home, the average life expectancy was less than 50
years; infant mortality rates were unacceptably high; many
women died in [...]]]></description>
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		<title>The Dateless Physicist</title>
		<link>http://portal.gynzer.com/wordpress/?p=125</link>
		<comments>http://portal.gynzer.com/wordpress/?p=125#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 01 Jan 1970 00:00:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ron_Gines</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Jokes]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[Every Friday after work, a mathematician goes down to the Ice Cream Parlor, sits in the second-to-last seat, turns to the last seat, which is empty, and asks a girl, who isn&#8217;t there, if he can buy her an ice cream cone. 
The owner, who is used to the weird, local university types, always shrugs [...]]]></description>
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		<title>The Sleeping Juror</title>
		<link>http://portal.gynzer.com/wordpress/?p=122</link>
		<comments>http://portal.gynzer.com/wordpress/?p=122#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 01 Jan 1970 00:00:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ron_Gines</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Jokes]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[A lawyer was well into a lengthy cross-examination when he stopped and said:  &#8220;Your honor, a juror is asleep.&#8221;
The judge ruled: &#8220;You put him to sleep; you wake him up.&#8221;
]]></description>
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		<title>The DC-8 Landing</title>
		<link>http://portal.gynzer.com/wordpress/?p=118</link>
		<comments>http://portal.gynzer.com/wordpress/?p=118#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 01 Jan 1970 00:00:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ron_Gines</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Jokes]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[One day, the pilot of a Cherokee 180 was told by the tower to hold short of the runway while a DC-8 landed. The DC-8 landed, rolled out, turned around, and taxied back past the Cherokee. Some quick-witted comedian in the DC-8 crew got on the radio and said, &#8220;What a cute little plane. Did [...]]]></description>
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		<title>A Daughters Letter</title>
		<link>http://portal.gynzer.com/wordpress/?p=115</link>
		<comments>http://portal.gynzer.com/wordpress/?p=115#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 01 Jan 1970 00:00:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ron_Gines</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Jokes]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[A mother enters her daughter&#8217;s bedroom and sees a letter
on the bed. With the worst premonition, she reads it, with
trembling hands:
Dear Mom,
It is with great regret and sorrow that I&#8217;m telling you
that I have eloped with my new boyfriend. I found real
passion and he is so nice, even with all his piercing and
tattoos, and I [...]]]></description>
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		<title>The Caterbury Tales</title>
		<link>http://portal.gynzer.com/wordpress/?p=114</link>
		<comments>http://portal.gynzer.com/wordpress/?p=114#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 01 Jan 1970 00:00:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ron_Gines</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Jokes]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false"></guid>
		<description><![CDATA[My son stayed up half the night studying for his English
Literature exam. He would drink coffee almost constantly
while attempting to read &#8220;The Canterbury Tales.&#8221; I awoke
at 4 A. M. and found him studying with mug in hand, and
asked him, &#8220;What have you got there?&#8221;   
He answered&#8230; &#8220;Just my cup and Chaucer.&#8221;  
]]></description>
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		<title>Senior Personal Ads</title>
		<link>http://portal.gynzer.com/wordpress/?p=106</link>
		<comments>http://portal.gynzer.com/wordpress/?p=106#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 01 Jan 1970 00:00:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ron_Gines</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Jokes]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[Some &#8220;Senior&#8221; personal ads seen in Florida newspapers: 
(Who says seniors don&#8217;t have a sense of humor?)

FOXY LADY: Sexy, fashion-conscious blue-haired beauty, 80&#8217;s, slim, 5&#8242;4&#8243; (used to be 5&#8242;6&#8243;), searching for sharp-looking, sharp-dressing companion. Matching white shoes and belt a plus. 
LONG-TERM COMMITMENT: Recent widow who has just buried fourth husband, and am looking for [...]]]></description>
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		<title>Fruity Wisdom</title>
		<link>http://portal.gynzer.com/wordpress/?p=105</link>
		<comments>http://portal.gynzer.com/wordpress/?p=105#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 01 Jan 1970 00:00:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ron_Gines</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Jokes]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
]]></description>
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		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Long Distance Breakup</title>
		<link>http://portal.gynzer.com/wordpress/?p=104</link>
		<comments>http://portal.gynzer.com/wordpress/?p=104#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 01 Jan 1970 00:00:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ron_Gines</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Jokes]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false"></guid>
		<description><![CDATA[A Marine stationed in Afghanistan recently received a
&#8220;Dear John&#8221; letter from his girlfriend back home.  It read
as follows:

Dear Ricky,
I can no longer continue our relationship.  The distance
between us is just too great.  I must admit that I have
cheated on you twice since you&#8217;ve been gone, and it&#8217;s not
fair to either of us. [...]]]></description>
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